Imagine thirteen college friends, many reconnecting for the first time since college over fifteen years ago, all meeting at an all-inclusive resort in Mexico called Secrets Capri in Playa del Carmen for Super Bowl weekend. Because this happened. And The Monster was there. And he lived through it. Barely.
It was a Northwestern reunion over the long weekend. It involved drinking. Too much drinking. Way too much drinking. And some eating. But not as much eating as drinking. And the eating was bad. Really bad. So that necessitated more drinking to wash away the evil taste.
There are a bunch of restaurants at the resort. The Monster and cohorts tried three of them. One was a Mexican themed buffet featuring a “Mexican” performance. The food proved worse than the performance (there was nothing Mexican about it) and that is saying something. In Mexico, the Mexican food was worse than you’d get at Del Taco. Truth.
Seriously, how do you mess up this view?
Because Secrets Capri accomplished this Herculean task. Buffalo wings tasted radioactive. Pizza just nasty. Salad uneatable. Tacos just wrong.
There was also a Benihana style restaurant. They made The Monster were a long sleeved, collared shirt. That was almost as annoying as how repulsive the meal ended up being.
Here’s the thing, who cares? It’s an all-inclusive resort called Secrets Capri in Playa Del Carmen with your best friends from college. What did you expect, good food? Michelin three starred cuisine? You’re a captive audience and really you’re just there to have a great time.
And that’s precisely what happened.
True story, The Monster got cut off at the all-inclusive bar. We’ll save that dandy of a tale for a later date…
Why go? Shhhh! It’s a secret.
Monster rating: 1/5 Monsters for food, 5/5 Monsters for fun
Carretera Federal 387 Km. 299, Solidaridad, 77710 Playa del Carmen, Quintana Roo, Mexico
+52 984 873 4880