#15!!! SIDECAR

When it comes to eating out diners put a premium on the food served, the decor and the service.  Great food and decor never make up for crappy service.  Enter Sidecar…

The Monster has been standing by the hostess stand for ten minutes when he starts playing on his Blackberry.  Two tables in front of us and no one has even acknowledged we’re here.  Waitresses passing by and still we stand.

Would have left already if not for the fact that Ventura is an hour away and the game says The Monster has to eat here.

Now five tables waiting and we are still being blithely ignored.  Four separate people who work here have walked by and chosen not to say a thing. 

Now acknowledged but still waiting.  Woefully understaffed as tables sit dirty.  A four year old and his brother scream and cry.  The child is screaming “I hate you daddy” on Father’s Day.  Is this what The Monster has to look forward to?  The father looks completely nonplussed.  Perhaps insolence is something one grows used to. 

Twenty minutes. 

The child has stopped crying.

The Monster may start.

There is an empty table for four.  It’s been empty the entire time.

We’re still standing half an hour later.

The Monster hates this place.

Thirty-five minutes.

Person leaving said it was the worst service they’ve ever experienced.  Now seeing how bad it can get is actually part of the game.

Forty minutes in The Monster demands the empty table.  Luckily it’s a bad one in a dark corner with a view into the kitchen. 

Order a bowl of creamy tomato soup and a special, the crab and squash blossom pasta which is penne, tarragon in a lemon-garlic cream sauce.  The Monster feels positive it will be horrible given the waiter’s glowing recommendation that it’s “pretty good.”  He’s lying, he’s never even had it.  Also, they have no bread.  Because it’s not ready.  Given it is 2:10 and they close for lunch at 2 that’s a crackpot excuse.

The menu, who cares?  You have zero reason to be in Ventura eating here.

Not that it matters, but the food was donkey balls bad.

Why go?  Court ordered punishment.

Monster rating: 0 Monsters

3029 East Main Street
Ventura, CA 93003

(805) 653-7433

The SideCar Restaurant on Urbanspoon

2 Comments

Filed under #15!!! Sidecar, Reviews

2 responses to “#15!!! SIDECAR

  1. Marc

    One of the funniest reviews EVER! “Donkey balls bad!”

    That pasta looked absolutely disgusting….

    Maybe it should be court ordered punishment. Or maybe it’s Hell.

    Keep up the good work Mr. Monster!

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